K. A. Laity

CHARACTERS

OTHER timid.

ONE Slightly less timid.


SETTING
Uncertain.


TIME
Elastic.


(Seated on a rock on an otherwise empty stage, OTHER and ONE side by side. ONE is reading the Book.)


OTHER
Are you done yet?

ONE
Just this bit more.

(Silence except perhaps for OTHER’S impatient tapping while ONE finishes reading. At last ONE closes the book with some satisfaction, sighs and hands it over to OTHER.)

OTHER
Thanks.

(immediately starts reading while standing, pacing a little)

ONE
(chin on hands)

Do you ever wonder—?

OTHER
Shhh!

ONE
(softer)
Do you ever wonder—?

OTHER
I’m trying to read!

ONE
I know that, but don’t you think we should talk about it?

OTHER
No! Now, shhhh.

(OTHER is silent for a while, but occasionally looking over at ONE who stares into space.)

Do you think we should -- you know, talk about it?

ONE
(a little petulant)

Not if you don’t want to—

OTHER
It’s not -- I didn’t say -- it’s just I need to finish this bit.

ONE
Go ahead. I won’t interrupt.

(ONE stares off into the distance again. OTHER keeps looking up from reading, distracted.)

OTHER
(finally closing book)

Well!

ONE
Well?

OTHER
I thought you wanted to talk about it?

ONE
Only if you do.

OTHER
Oh, don’t be like that. What did you think?

ONE
I’m not sure.

OTHER
Did you like the—?

ONE
Well, yes, of course.

OTHER
Really?

ONE
Oh, you didn’t?

OTHER
I never said that.

ONE
But you looked somewhat—

OTHER
Well, you have to admit—

ONE
I don’t see that at all.

OTHER
Well, maybe it’s just me.

ONE
Oh, here we go again.

OTHER
What do you mean?

ONE
It just always comes back to this.

OTHER
I never—

ONE
Oh, but you always do.

OTHER
Not true! You’re just jumping to conclusions because I said—

ONE
But you didn’t even say, you just always imply—

OTHER
No, you always infer -- and not always from what I actually say.

ONE
Perhaps if you ever finished a sentence—

OTHER
I wouldn’t because you always interrupt.

ONE
I’d never, it’s you who inevitably—

OTHER
And there, that’s another one, “inevitably,” as if I never change.

ONE
Do you though? Do any of us?

OTHER
I do.

ONE
(laughs)

Suddenly you’re all certainty.

OTHER
(shrugs)

I can be when I want to be.

ONE
But not when I want you to be.

OTHER
Ah ha! So this is about you.

ONE
I just wanted to know what you thought about it—

OTHER
Well, let me finish.

(reads a bit longer, eventually closes book)

ONE
All right, all right -- well, then?

OTHER
(pause)

Did you like it?

ONE
Ha!

OTHER
No, really -- I thought I did at first—

ONE
Until it—

OTHER
Yeah, and then I began to wonder—

ONE
So did I! It wasn’t very true to life then, was it?

OTHER
Is that a good measure?

ONE
As good as any, don’t you think?

OTHER
I’m not too sure. (beat) What if it’s true to life, but it’s not the life we’ve lived?

(they look at each other, look at audience, then suddenly look away to opposite sides)

ONE
I once—

OTHER
What?

ONE
Oh, nothing.

(silence for a few beats)

OTHER
It’s only a book, right?

ONE
(laughs)

Why were we reading it anyway?

OTHER
You know, it was recommended by—

ONE
Oh, that’s right.

OTHER
She thought it was very—

ONE
Well, she would.

(both chuckle)

Not that it matters anyway.

OTHER
No, no -- we’re perfectly happy, right?

ONE
Perfect.

(pause)

What a word. A state of being perfect. Without a flaw.

OTHER
(shifting uncomfortably)

Well, in a manner of speaking, I suppose.

ONE
Can we be without a flaw ‘in a manner of speaking’?

OTHER
I was only saying—

ONE
Yes.

OTHER
What?

ONE
Oh, let’s not argue.

OTHER
Who’s arguing?

ONE
I know.

OTHER
Know what? It’s not as if—

ONE
But it is, you know.

OTHER
I just wanted to share the experience.

ONE
Experience?

OTHER
Well, you know what I mean—

ONE
I suppose.

OTHER
What now?

ONE
It’s nothing.

OTHER
It is, or you wouldn’t say that.

ONE
I said, it’s nothing.

OTHER
It never is when you say that.

ONE
Well, don’t magnify it.

OTHER
Ooh, ‘magnify’! Nice word that. Very appropriate.

ONE
Are you trying to be ironic?

OTHER
Yes.

ONE
Don’t.

OTHER
Why?

ONE
Well, it doesn’t suit you.

OTHER
I think it suits me down to the ground.

ONE
Wow, that’s quite an original expression.

OTHER
You’re doing it again.

ONE
What?

OTHER
Arguing.

ONE
It’s that damn book.

OTHER
It was supposed to make us feel better, she said.

ONE
She was so very wrong.

OTHER
I think it’s the book that’s wrong.

ONE
You don’t think it’s…us?

OTHER
(holding up book)

No—look. Even the binding’s cheap.

ONE
If it were really worth something—

OTHER
Of course, but—

ONE
You’re right. I don’t know what I was thinking—

OTHER
We were thinking.

ONE
Chuck it.

OTHER
(surprised laugh)

Right here?

ONE
Yes, chuck it.

OTHER
(Throws it on the ground in front of ONE. Both stare at it for a few beats.)

Good riddance, eh?

ONE
Yes.
(exchanged looks, then both staring at the book a little longer)

OTHER
Let’s go.

ONE
Yes.
(They do not, however, move immediately. Eventually OTHER steps up to take ONE’s hand.)

OTHER
Let’s go.

ONE
Yes.

(This time they go, albeit slowly. They stop when OTHER is off stage, ONE still on, eventually stretching the linked hands between them. ONE looks back at the book lying on the floor.)

Stupid book.

(Pause for a few more beats, staring at the book, and finally exit.)

CURTAIN